I don’t know for sure if President Obama prays to Jesus, Allah or some other Deity. Regardless, his prayers are answered. Just look at what is happening in the Republican presidential primary race. If it keeps up, no candidate will be left standing when the 2012 Republican National Convention convenes August 27th in Tampa, Florida.
And even if Newt Gingrich or Mitt Romney—currently, the two leading candidates—survive the vicious political knife fight, both are so badly wounded that voters will likely take them off life-support in spite of desperate efforts by spin doctors to revive one of the men with huge sums of money transfusions from Citizens United inspired Super Pacs. At this point in the election year, Democrats of all religious persuasions are beginning to thank their Higher Powers for the sudden reversal in the Party’s November prospects.
I’m a Presbyterian, the January Liturgist for services at my small church in West Baton Rouge Parish. But despite my “good works” spending a total of fifteen minutes during the month leading our Sunday rituals, I haven’t won a single lottery, though I promised God to give an extra hundred dollars to the church if He (or She) would let me win one of the $100-million jackpots. In fact, I will settle for a million—or much less.
Joking aside, the viciousness that Gingrich and Romney have displayed in the GOP primary debates has been remarkable. Given the distortions and outright falsehoods perpetuated by both men, I have begun to suspect that both men received training from Fox “News,” aka the Republican Propoganda Network. Students attending the classes have been so successful in the confines of the GOP’s lunatic fringe that Fox is considering changing its “Fair and Balanced” slogan to “How to Lie and Get Away With It.”
Should such an event take place, the network will undoubtedly face a lawsuit from pill-popper Rush Limbaugh and his ilk. Indeed, AM radio is mainly responsible for the tenor of much of hateful dialogue that defines politics nowadays. Never was this more apparent than watching the South Carolina debate in which serial adulterer Gingrich received rousing ovations for comments tinged with racism. The Tea Party was out in force in the state, which still displays the Confederate Flag outside its Capitol and was the first to secede from the Union after Abraham Lincoln was elected President. Not that South Carolinans are completely adverse to black folks.
The late South Carolina segregationist Strom Thurmond—the longest serving U.S. Senator in history—fathered an African-American child and provided a few bucks of financial assistance for her college education and other needs. Even so, I doubt the daughter took much pride in daddy for setting a congressional record by filibustering the Civil Rights Act of 1957. Thurmond’s tradition is carried forward by Republican voters in the state, Tea Partiers in particular.
Next up is Florida, and the audience mood during Monday night’s debate in Tampa was considerably different than South Carolina. NBC’s Brian Williams, the moderator, banned applause and other demonstrations. Consequently, the response was solemn to Gingrich’s zingers—and for that matter, the feeble attempts to appear tough by department store mannequin Romney. Maybe the silence will prompt the two candidates to abandon gutter politics.
That’s too bad from the standpoint of the President. Every little bit of Republican idiocy is an answer to Obama’s prayers. And for endangered lawmakers in his party. Since a lot of congressman are Presbyterians, I will continue my weekly trek to West Baton Rouge parish. Besides, anyone who has read the New Testament knows that Jesus was a Democrat.
So I’m delaying my search for the nearest mosque.

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